Mak, My First Muse

Before I even knew how to hold a camera, I already knew the sound of one — klik, klik, klik. Mak’s Canon film camera was always with her. Birthdays, school events, family trips — dia mesti ada, quietly snapping away. Sometimes we’d tease her, “Asyik ambik gambar je, Mak!” but now I’m glad she never stopped.

Professionally, I’m still searching for my photography idol. I’ve seen so many photographers whose work I admire, but belum jumpa lagi yang betul-betul rasa macam “this is it.” Still, if you ask me who inspired me first — it’s always been Mak.

Masih segar lagi di ingatan aku, my first birthday party masa umur 7 tahun. Aku dengan kawan-kawan dah tak sabar nak ngap all the food and cake, tiba-tiba Mak suruh kita orang smile and pose. “Okay semua senyuuumm, pandang cameraaaa.” Masa tu rasa, esok petang ke baru boleh makan cake? Hahahaha! But now that photo is one of my favourites. Mak right there behind the lens — freezing that moment for me to keep.

One of my favorite things about Mak is how she would compile all those photos into albums. Not just one big family album, but a special one for each of us — my siblings and I each had our own. Every page was filled with birthdays, school events, small moments that would have been forgotten if she hadn’t saved them. Looking through the photos years later, I realized that she wasn’t just documenting life. She was building a time capsule for each of us to carry forever. And photography wasn’t her only love language. Mak’s cooking? LEGENDARY. And to this day, she still shows her love by preparing meals that taste like home.

I may still be figuring out my path in photography, but the truth is, my first muse — the one who taught me how to see? That’s easy. It’s Mak — always has been, always will be.